Dear Friends,
Sunday night, December 18th, is the first night of Chanukah.
Lessons From Chanukah: Clarity, Purity and Joy
Happy Chanukah!
Yaakov
Saturday, December 17, 2022
Saturday, November 26, 2022
Free One Page Version of The SIMPLE3 Plan
Dear Friends,
The one page version to print and post in your home is free. I ask though, that you please subscribe to this blog before opening it (you can unsubscribe at anytime). To subscribe, type your email address in the box on your right and click on the "Subscribe" tab. You will receive an email with a confirmation link (check your spam folder if you don't see it). Please click on the link to confirm your subscription.
After subscribing to the blog, or if you're already subscribed, you can open the one page version here:
The one page version to print and post in your home is free. I ask though, that you please subscribe to this blog before opening it (you can unsubscribe at anytime). To subscribe, type your email address in the box on your right and click on the "Subscribe" tab. You will receive an email with a confirmation link (check your spam folder if you don't see it). Please click on the link to confirm your subscription.
After subscribing to the blog, or if you're already subscribed, you can open the one page version here:
If you'd like more info on working with me one-on-one, for tips and suggestions on how to personalize the plan for you, click here.
Thank you for subscribing to my blog and all the best,
Yaakov
Yaakov
Saturday, October 8, 2022
Taking Refuge in a Sukkah of Faith
Dear Friends,
Here is an article for the holiday:
Taking Refuge in a Sukkah of Faith
Have a Chag Sameach!
Yaakov
Here is an article for the holiday:
Taking Refuge in a Sukkah of Faith
Have a Chag Sameach!
Yaakov
Saturday, October 1, 2022
You’ve Fallen But You Can Get Up: A Guide for Guys on How to Strengthen Your Observance
As religious guys get older, many continue to grow in their connection to Judaism, deepening their commitment to learning, davening and observance. At the same time, it’s not uncommon for some guys to fall spiritually. It might be a slight decline in religious observance and Torah learning or it might be a complete break from Orthodox Judaism. Single guys are often more prone to this but it can happen to married guys as well. It is often not a willful or theological decision. It’s just that temptations, distractions and social pressures slowly chip away at their observance, unless they take proactive measures.
A common occurrence are guys who drifted away from Judaism during their single years or were never solidly observant, but now they are starting to think about marriage. They realize that they want to raise their children in an observant home. If that’s you, you’ve come to the right place and this article will show you how to level up your observance in a doable manner.
No matter how far one has fallen, no one is too far gone. Everyone can do teshuva and repent. The main act of repentance is to just stop doing the sin or restart doing the mitzvot that one has lapsed in. Do not wallow in the past. Leave regret for Yom Kippur. The rest of the year, just focus on doing the best you can and starting fresh after a setback.
Sometimes a person’s religious observance lessens due to stress or emotional issues. Enhancing your physical and psychological health will make it easier to increase your observance. Three ways of doing that are exercising (including building muscle mass), eating healthy and getting enough sleep.
The most challenging part of increasing one’s observance is often changing one’s mindset. Instead of focusing on the negative and thinking of yourself as a lapsed Jew, focus on the positive and think of yourself as a Jew on the path to grow in his observance (at a pace that is doable for you). As you progress, you will then think of yourself as an observant Jew who sometimes slips up, a work in progress like the rest of us.
It is often much easier than anticipated to get back to an observant lifestyle. Just making a few changes can fairly quickly get you back on track. Judaism is about having a relationship with God, and like any relationship it is not all or nothing. There is nothing hypocritical about doing some mitzvot (or some of the steps below) and not yet doing others. Someone who asks, “Why should I eat Kosher if I'm not keeping Shabbat?” is like a diabetic who asks, “If I can’t stop smoking, why should I bother taking my diabetes medication?” Whatever you are able to do to enhance your spiritual health, do it and do it today.
Imagine a guy who withdrew a large sum from the bank and as he’s leaving he drops the cash and the money goes flying everywhere. Is he going to ignore all the bills, just because he won’t be able to retrieve every single one? Whatever mitzvah you are able to grab, grab it while you still can! Take the first step and God will help you come back home. Soon, it’ll be like you never left.
Here is an 8 step plan to get back on track. Even doing one step is a tremendous accomplishment. Do not fall into the trap of seeing a step that you think you will never be able to do and discarding all of them. Also do not fall into the trap of doing just a few of the steps and thinking, “I’m good. I did enough. I can stop now.” A person’s Judaism and connection to God is never stagnant: it is either getting stronger or weaker. Be among those who are getting stronger and keep moving forward on this journey.
8 Steps to Becoming Observant Again:
1. Find a rabbi. Have a rabbi (or at least a mentor who is learned) who you can ask for personalized guidance about increasing your observance and dealing with life challenges. There are many wonderful rabbis out there, ask around until you find one with whom you connect.
2. Spend time with like minded people. Make sure the people you socialize with do not bring you down or sabotage your spiritual growth. It can be very challenging to be an island of observance all by yourself. Seek out social connections to give you support and encouragement. You can meet new people through mutual friends, at shul or at events or classes. For those who are single, be selective who you date and make sure you’re compatible. Before saying yes to a girl, find out where she’s holding religiously and which direction she’s headed. (When in doubt about this or about applying any of the steps, speak to your rabbi or mentor.) Once you are living an observant lifestyle, you will be able to date high quality religious girls who will only date religious guys. (As part of your spiritual growth, upgrade your language and drop the profanity; it gives people the wrong impression about you.)
3. Wear tzitzis. It’s an easy mitzvah and they sell very comfortable ones. When you’re ready, wear a head covering. By wearing tzitzis and a head covering, you make a statement to yourself and to those around you that there is a God who created the world and whose guidance you follow as best you can. (Women make this statement by dressing modestly.)
4. Eat kosher. If you’re eating healthy anyway, you won’t have to cut out that much from your diet. Yes, it’s more expensive, but the same God who gave you enough money to afford your current expenses, will give you enough money so you can eat kosher.
5. Study Torah. You don’t need to be observant to benefit from Torah study. Learn with a study partner once or twice a week or preferably daily, a section of the Torah you enjoy learning. It might be Talmud, a commentary on the Parsha or Chassidus. You can find a study partner either through a local Kollel, Shul or through Partnersintorah.com. If possible, listen to a Torah podcast or read a sefer daily, even if only for a few minutes, perhaps during your commute or while you exercise. Include in your study the basic laws of Judaism, as there is much more to Judaism than what is included here. Two works to consider are Halacha 24/7/12 by Rabbi Aharon E. Marcus and Shaarei Halachah (It’s in English) by Rabbi Zeev Greenwald. Even if you are not currently observant but have a background in studying Talmud, consider learning the Daf Yomi, Amud Yomi or Mishnah Yomi. There are many wonderful teachers available, you can listen to their classes for free at alldaf.org or outorah.org. Two inspiring books not about Jewish law to consider are: A Bit More Advice, an anthology of the teachings of Rebbe Nachman of Breslov, and Olam HaAvodah (English) by Rabbi Moshe Don Kestenbaum (among many other choices of amazing works on Judaism).
6. Put on tefillin daily. From there, gradually increase what you say during Shacharis or start your day strong and go to shul for Shacharis. When you are ready to build from there, start reciting Mincha and then Maariv. If at any point it feels too much, backtrack a bit and then start moving forward again. Find a Shul you are comfortable going to on Shabbos, feel free to come late in the beginning and then gradually increase going to Shul to once a day and when possible, for all three tefillos. Davening is hard for a lot of guys; do the best you can. If going to shul is very hard for you, skip it for now. Not going to shul does not make you non observant! Especially if you find it hard to connect to God during davening, spend a few minutes each day speaking to God in your native language, preferably alone and outloud. This will help you build a personal connection with God. Music can be a powerful tool to help us uncover our inner yearning for God. Try the music of Shlomo Carlebach, Eitan Katz or any of the other popular Jewish composers.
7. Keep Shabbos. This is not all or nothing; observe what you can and increase from there. Many have commented how spending time away from their phone and computer is very freeing. In terms of what to do on Shabbos: preferably, find a Shul you feel comfortable going to, even if only on Friday night or Shabbos morning. Go to places for meals where they host an authentic Shabbos seudah with song and Torah thoughts or host one yourself, get together with friends, periodically go away for Shabbos, set up to learn with a study partner, go for a walk and gather a pile of books to read that you’ve always wanted to read but never seemed to have the time.
8. Observe Yichud and Negiah. As with everything else, this is not all or nothing; do the best you can to observe the laws of Yichud, not secluding yourself with a girl who is forbidden to you or touching her (Negiah). For those who are married, speak to your rabbi about observing the laws of Family Purity. For those who are single, besides for the spiritual benefits of following these laws, it will also give you greater clarity as to who will be a more compatible life partner; your judgment will not be clouded by already being in a physical relationship.
Are you giving something up by becoming more observant? Yes, but you will gain a huge ROI. The effort you put into practicing authentic Judaism will yield priceless returns.
Each time you do a mitzvah or refrain from doing a sin brings you everlasting merit and brings your Father in Heaven pleasure, even if you stumble the very next day. You may ask, “What pleasure do I bring God? There are many people who are much more observant than me, what value am I to God?” Reb Noson of Breslov addressed this point in a letter he wrote (Healing Leaves: Prescriptions for inner strength, meaning and hope by Breslov Research Institute), “The essence of God’s greatness is that the very person who is most distant from Him and most attached to physicality can and should serve Him. Such service is God’s greatest pleasure and delight!”
Some observe mitzvot because that is what they have been doing their entire life and they never tasted sin. While they will be rewarded for staying away from sin, what you do for God is unique. When you do a mitzvah, you proclaim, “Even though I know the allure of sin, nevertheless, I still choose to do this mitzvah!” That brings God tremendous pleasure.
Think of this article as God’s reminder that He’s still waiting for you to come home. If He didn’t care how you lived your life, why would He have led you to this article?
No one knows how much time they will have in this world, grab that opportunity now with both hands!
Pick one of the above steps to start with. Choose the one that is easiest for you or that you are most motivated to do. There will be setbacks, but after each one, begin anew with a fresh start.
Right now, before you get distracted by something else, open your calendar and write in each month a different step to focus on. During that month, schedule in something tangible and doable related to that step (or work at whatever pace your mentor recommends). After each month, carry over the gains from the previous month and begin the new month with a fresh start. Once you’ve gone through all the steps, choose which specific steps need more strengthening and focus on them during the coming months. Soon, your life will be enriched and guided by the wisdom of the Torah. No matter how stormy life may be, a strong connection to God will be your anchor.
Even if right now, you choose not to increase your observance at all, at least start learning Torah. Eicha Rabbah (Petichta 2) writes, “We have found that the Holy One blessed be He overlooked idolatry, forbidden relations, and murder, but did not overlook disdain of the Torah, as it is stated: “...For what reason did the land perish?” (Jeremiah 9:11). It is not written here that it was because of idolatry, forbidden relations, and murder; rather, “...Because they have forsaken My Torah…” (Jeremiah 9:12).”
At all costs, do not forsake the Torah!
Please share this post with family and friends, and you can subscribe to this blog by scrolling to the top of the page on the right.
A common occurrence are guys who drifted away from Judaism during their single years or were never solidly observant, but now they are starting to think about marriage. They realize that they want to raise their children in an observant home. If that’s you, you’ve come to the right place and this article will show you how to level up your observance in a doable manner.
No matter how far one has fallen, no one is too far gone. Everyone can do teshuva and repent. The main act of repentance is to just stop doing the sin or restart doing the mitzvot that one has lapsed in. Do not wallow in the past. Leave regret for Yom Kippur. The rest of the year, just focus on doing the best you can and starting fresh after a setback.
Sometimes a person’s religious observance lessens due to stress or emotional issues. Enhancing your physical and psychological health will make it easier to increase your observance. Three ways of doing that are exercising (including building muscle mass), eating healthy and getting enough sleep.
The most challenging part of increasing one’s observance is often changing one’s mindset. Instead of focusing on the negative and thinking of yourself as a lapsed Jew, focus on the positive and think of yourself as a Jew on the path to grow in his observance (at a pace that is doable for you). As you progress, you will then think of yourself as an observant Jew who sometimes slips up, a work in progress like the rest of us.
It is often much easier than anticipated to get back to an observant lifestyle. Just making a few changes can fairly quickly get you back on track. Judaism is about having a relationship with God, and like any relationship it is not all or nothing. There is nothing hypocritical about doing some mitzvot (or some of the steps below) and not yet doing others. Someone who asks, “Why should I eat Kosher if I'm not keeping Shabbat?” is like a diabetic who asks, “If I can’t stop smoking, why should I bother taking my diabetes medication?” Whatever you are able to do to enhance your spiritual health, do it and do it today.
Imagine a guy who withdrew a large sum from the bank and as he’s leaving he drops the cash and the money goes flying everywhere. Is he going to ignore all the bills, just because he won’t be able to retrieve every single one? Whatever mitzvah you are able to grab, grab it while you still can! Take the first step and God will help you come back home. Soon, it’ll be like you never left.
Here is an 8 step plan to get back on track. Even doing one step is a tremendous accomplishment. Do not fall into the trap of seeing a step that you think you will never be able to do and discarding all of them. Also do not fall into the trap of doing just a few of the steps and thinking, “I’m good. I did enough. I can stop now.” A person’s Judaism and connection to God is never stagnant: it is either getting stronger or weaker. Be among those who are getting stronger and keep moving forward on this journey.
8 Steps to Becoming Observant Again:
1. Find a rabbi. Have a rabbi (or at least a mentor who is learned) who you can ask for personalized guidance about increasing your observance and dealing with life challenges. There are many wonderful rabbis out there, ask around until you find one with whom you connect.
2. Spend time with like minded people. Make sure the people you socialize with do not bring you down or sabotage your spiritual growth. It can be very challenging to be an island of observance all by yourself. Seek out social connections to give you support and encouragement. You can meet new people through mutual friends, at shul or at events or classes. For those who are single, be selective who you date and make sure you’re compatible. Before saying yes to a girl, find out where she’s holding religiously and which direction she’s headed. (When in doubt about this or about applying any of the steps, speak to your rabbi or mentor.) Once you are living an observant lifestyle, you will be able to date high quality religious girls who will only date religious guys. (As part of your spiritual growth, upgrade your language and drop the profanity; it gives people the wrong impression about you.)
3. Wear tzitzis. It’s an easy mitzvah and they sell very comfortable ones. When you’re ready, wear a head covering. By wearing tzitzis and a head covering, you make a statement to yourself and to those around you that there is a God who created the world and whose guidance you follow as best you can. (Women make this statement by dressing modestly.)
4. Eat kosher. If you’re eating healthy anyway, you won’t have to cut out that much from your diet. Yes, it’s more expensive, but the same God who gave you enough money to afford your current expenses, will give you enough money so you can eat kosher.
5. Study Torah. You don’t need to be observant to benefit from Torah study. Learn with a study partner once or twice a week or preferably daily, a section of the Torah you enjoy learning. It might be Talmud, a commentary on the Parsha or Chassidus. You can find a study partner either through a local Kollel, Shul or through Partnersintorah.com. If possible, listen to a Torah podcast or read a sefer daily, even if only for a few minutes, perhaps during your commute or while you exercise. Include in your study the basic laws of Judaism, as there is much more to Judaism than what is included here. Two works to consider are Halacha 24/7/12 by Rabbi Aharon E. Marcus and Shaarei Halachah (It’s in English) by Rabbi Zeev Greenwald. Even if you are not currently observant but have a background in studying Talmud, consider learning the Daf Yomi, Amud Yomi or Mishnah Yomi. There are many wonderful teachers available, you can listen to their classes for free at alldaf.org or outorah.org. Two inspiring books not about Jewish law to consider are: A Bit More Advice, an anthology of the teachings of Rebbe Nachman of Breslov, and Olam HaAvodah (English) by Rabbi Moshe Don Kestenbaum (among many other choices of amazing works on Judaism).
6. Put on tefillin daily. From there, gradually increase what you say during Shacharis or start your day strong and go to shul for Shacharis. When you are ready to build from there, start reciting Mincha and then Maariv. If at any point it feels too much, backtrack a bit and then start moving forward again. Find a Shul you are comfortable going to on Shabbos, feel free to come late in the beginning and then gradually increase going to Shul to once a day and when possible, for all three tefillos. Davening is hard for a lot of guys; do the best you can. If going to shul is very hard for you, skip it for now. Not going to shul does not make you non observant! Especially if you find it hard to connect to God during davening, spend a few minutes each day speaking to God in your native language, preferably alone and outloud. This will help you build a personal connection with God. Music can be a powerful tool to help us uncover our inner yearning for God. Try the music of Shlomo Carlebach, Eitan Katz or any of the other popular Jewish composers.
7. Keep Shabbos. This is not all or nothing; observe what you can and increase from there. Many have commented how spending time away from their phone and computer is very freeing. In terms of what to do on Shabbos: preferably, find a Shul you feel comfortable going to, even if only on Friday night or Shabbos morning. Go to places for meals where they host an authentic Shabbos seudah with song and Torah thoughts or host one yourself, get together with friends, periodically go away for Shabbos, set up to learn with a study partner, go for a walk and gather a pile of books to read that you’ve always wanted to read but never seemed to have the time.
8. Observe Yichud and Negiah. As with everything else, this is not all or nothing; do the best you can to observe the laws of Yichud, not secluding yourself with a girl who is forbidden to you or touching her (Negiah). For those who are married, speak to your rabbi about observing the laws of Family Purity. For those who are single, besides for the spiritual benefits of following these laws, it will also give you greater clarity as to who will be a more compatible life partner; your judgment will not be clouded by already being in a physical relationship.
Are you giving something up by becoming more observant? Yes, but you will gain a huge ROI. The effort you put into practicing authentic Judaism will yield priceless returns.
Each time you do a mitzvah or refrain from doing a sin brings you everlasting merit and brings your Father in Heaven pleasure, even if you stumble the very next day. You may ask, “What pleasure do I bring God? There are many people who are much more observant than me, what value am I to God?” Reb Noson of Breslov addressed this point in a letter he wrote (Healing Leaves: Prescriptions for inner strength, meaning and hope by Breslov Research Institute), “The essence of God’s greatness is that the very person who is most distant from Him and most attached to physicality can and should serve Him. Such service is God’s greatest pleasure and delight!”
Some observe mitzvot because that is what they have been doing their entire life and they never tasted sin. While they will be rewarded for staying away from sin, what you do for God is unique. When you do a mitzvah, you proclaim, “Even though I know the allure of sin, nevertheless, I still choose to do this mitzvah!” That brings God tremendous pleasure.
Think of this article as God’s reminder that He’s still waiting for you to come home. If He didn’t care how you lived your life, why would He have led you to this article?
No one knows how much time they will have in this world, grab that opportunity now with both hands!
Pick one of the above steps to start with. Choose the one that is easiest for you or that you are most motivated to do. There will be setbacks, but after each one, begin anew with a fresh start.
Right now, before you get distracted by something else, open your calendar and write in each month a different step to focus on. During that month, schedule in something tangible and doable related to that step (or work at whatever pace your mentor recommends). After each month, carry over the gains from the previous month and begin the new month with a fresh start. Once you’ve gone through all the steps, choose which specific steps need more strengthening and focus on them during the coming months. Soon, your life will be enriched and guided by the wisdom of the Torah. No matter how stormy life may be, a strong connection to God will be your anchor.
Even if right now, you choose not to increase your observance at all, at least start learning Torah. Eicha Rabbah (Petichta 2) writes, “We have found that the Holy One blessed be He overlooked idolatry, forbidden relations, and murder, but did not overlook disdain of the Torah, as it is stated: “...For what reason did the land perish?” (Jeremiah 9:11). It is not written here that it was because of idolatry, forbidden relations, and murder; rather, “...Because they have forsaken My Torah…” (Jeremiah 9:12).”
At all costs, do not forsake the Torah!
Please share this post with family and friends, and you can subscribe to this blog by scrolling to the top of the page on the right.
Saturday, September 10, 2022
Elul: Repentance
Dear Friends,
Elul is the month before Rosh Hashanah, and is the time of year we take stock of our lives and prepare for the High Holidays. Most of us have at least one area in which we struggle; perhaps it is being ethical in business, being moral, being charitable and kind, learning more Torah, refraining from hurting others, or an area of observance we are ready to strengthen.
Pick one area on which to focus and choose a manageable change you will make on a daily or at least weekly basis; input this change into your calendar or checklist. If possible, speak to your rabbi or spiritual mentor for guidance. The focus on repentance continues into next month until after Yom Kippur.
During Elul, we ask others for forgiveness for the times we wronged them, as Yom Kippur alone does not atone for those sins.
The main ways people harm others is financially or emotionally. If there is anyone who you have harmed financially (for example, withholding money that belongs to them or using underhanded tactics) and you have not yet made amends, now is the time to do so.
There are a number of ways we may have caused others emotional harm: making hurtful comments, gossiping about them or being hypercritical. Being well intentioned is not an excuse. There is often at least one person in our lives, whether at work, at home or in our family, that we are not treating appropriately. That has to stop. Now.
This month, compile a list of those you have hurt. One by one, go through the list and apologize and make amends if applicable. If you have trouble with one name, skip it for now and come back to it later. If you can’t think of anyone to apologize to, think about if there’s anyone you are in conflict with, or someone who is upset with you. While they may be partially to blame, likely you share some blame as well. If you take responsibility for your part, they will often take responsibility for theirs.
During the month of Elul it is customary to study works on ethical development. One classic is The Path of the Just by Rabbi Moshe Chaim Luzzatto. You can either study it from the beginning, or start with Chapter 11, which covers key areas of conduct, and then go back and study the rest of this work. Chapter 11 can be found here. Another classic is Duties of the Heart by Rabbi Bachya ibn Pekuda. You can either study it from the beginning (the first gate is often not studied nowadays), or you can study the third chapter of The Gate of Introspection, where there is a list of 30 fundamental ideas. Aim to study one idea each day of Elul and finish it in time for Rosh Hashanah. You can read the third chapter in English here.
As the High Holidays involve reciting many prayers, for suggestions on how to enhance your prayers, see, “How to Unlock the Hidden Power of Prayer.”
Questions for the month:
“Which area do I struggle with that I’m motivated to address this Elul and what commitment will I make?”
“Who have I wronged but never apologized and made amends? When will I contact them?”
“Which area do I struggle with that I’m motivated to address this Elul and what commitment will I make?”
“Who have I wronged but never apologized and made amends? When will I contact them?”
Have a great week,
Yaakov
Saturday, August 27, 2022
How to Bring More Blessing into Your Life
We all want to bring more blessing into our lives. Before Moses died, he told us exactly how to do that (Deuteronomy 11:26-28), “See, I am giving you today a blessing and a curse. The blessing (will occur) when you listen to the commandments of God, your God, that I command you today. And the curse (will occur) if you do not listen to the commandments of God your God and you stray from the path that I command you today…”
The truth of this teaching is easily observable. Spend time or a Shabbat meal with Jews who are doing their best to live an authentic, observant life. You will see that in general, those who live lives filled with mitzvot, learning, prayer and acts of kindness, are happier than those who do not. A Gallup poll confirmed increased wellbeing among practicing Jews.
I was recently in Passaic, NJ and spent time with some children who attend yeshiva there. They are being raised in a very wholesome environment. Their excitement about all things Jewish was palpable. They weren’t caught up in the toxic influences that unfortunately many children are exposed to nowadays. There was a different aura they gave off; one of purity and joy. They still had their innocence and sweetness.
In Rabbi Nachman Selzer’s fascinating book, Incredible! 2, he writes about Yossi Wallis. Yossi was at the pinnacle of material success and living a secular life of luxury in California. Yet he felt pulled to go back to Israel where he was born. It wasn’t a spiritual pull; it was something else. First, he realized in LA, where the Jews and non Jews socialized freely, that the chances of his children marrying non Jews was very high. But there was more and I quote, “It seemed pretty obvious to him that his kids would find their way to drugs and alcohol, just like so many of the teenagers living in their world. He looked at his cute little boys. So Innocent. So happy. So at peace with their lives. He pictured them in 10 years’ time, and he was filled with worry.”
Even as a secular Jew, Yossi realized that the life around him was not a life of enduring blessing. He ended up moving to Israel with his family and some time later they became observant. He is now a rabbi and the CEO of Arachim, a Kiruv organization based in Israel.
There is much depth and beauty behind the commandments. At the same time, do they all make sense to me? No. But you can’t argue with results. Compare those who live observant lives to those who do not. In general, who is more fulfilled, who has more nachas (pride) from their children? Which life do you want for yourself and your family?
Why the precise ingredients in Judaism work, I do not know. Only God knows. He created us and in the Torah taught us the optimal way to live. For thousands of years, His way has worked and His way will continue to work until the end of time.
Many see the benefits of an observant life but feel that it is beyond their ability. observance though, is not all or nothing. The more we observe, the more blessing we bring to our life. (This is not to say that observant Jews live a challenge free life, no one does and there would be no point to such a life. At the same time, regardless of the difficulties one has, a life of observance empirically yields greater fulfillment and greater protection from the negative influences of society than a life devoid of observance.)
Without realizing it, all Jews are already observing aspects of the Torah. At times, everyone eats kosher. On Saturday, no one is engaged all day in forbidden behavior. The key is to just widen the time and extent that one observes the Torah and to do so mindfully, because God commanded us. Even if one does not increase their level of observance one iota, but they start studying Torah regularly or send their children to yeshiva day schools and encourage them to study Torah in Israel post high school, they have made clear what their priorities are and what values they want to impart to the next generation.
Moses knew that a time would come when Jews would doubt their ability to follow the Torah and think it is beyond them. Before his death he urged them about the Torah (Deuteronomy 30:14), “Rather, the matter is very near to you, in your mouth and in your heart, to observe it.”
Moses pleaded with the Jewish people to always remember that the Torah is within their reach, no matter how far they stray. The Torah’s wisdom is very near to you. As close as the food in your mouth and the thoughts in your heart. It is who you are.
But to connect with your essence at the deepest level, you must take the initiative. It is up to you to observe the Torah, one step at a time.
Some see the value of an observant life but aren’t willing to put in the effort. They want the benefits without the work. But as we all know, if you want something of value, you have to put in the effort.
Bilam, a non Jewish prophet, saw the benefits of having lived a righteous life. He said (Numbers 23:10),”...May my soul die the death of the upright, and let my end be like his.” He wanted the results of living an upright life but he didn’t want to put in the effort.
Bilam’s mistake was that while he perceived through prophecy that the righteous would receive reward in the next world, he ignored what was right in front of his eyes! That living an upright life also brings blessing in this world! Right here, right now.
The truth of this teaching is easily observable. Spend time or a Shabbat meal with Jews who are doing their best to live an authentic, observant life. You will see that in general, those who live lives filled with mitzvot, learning, prayer and acts of kindness, are happier than those who do not. A Gallup poll confirmed increased wellbeing among practicing Jews.
I was recently in Passaic, NJ and spent time with some children who attend yeshiva there. They are being raised in a very wholesome environment. Their excitement about all things Jewish was palpable. They weren’t caught up in the toxic influences that unfortunately many children are exposed to nowadays. There was a different aura they gave off; one of purity and joy. They still had their innocence and sweetness.
In Rabbi Nachman Selzer’s fascinating book, Incredible! 2, he writes about Yossi Wallis. Yossi was at the pinnacle of material success and living a secular life of luxury in California. Yet he felt pulled to go back to Israel where he was born. It wasn’t a spiritual pull; it was something else. First, he realized in LA, where the Jews and non Jews socialized freely, that the chances of his children marrying non Jews was very high. But there was more and I quote, “It seemed pretty obvious to him that his kids would find their way to drugs and alcohol, just like so many of the teenagers living in their world. He looked at his cute little boys. So Innocent. So happy. So at peace with their lives. He pictured them in 10 years’ time, and he was filled with worry.”
Even as a secular Jew, Yossi realized that the life around him was not a life of enduring blessing. He ended up moving to Israel with his family and some time later they became observant. He is now a rabbi and the CEO of Arachim, a Kiruv organization based in Israel.
There is much depth and beauty behind the commandments. At the same time, do they all make sense to me? No. But you can’t argue with results. Compare those who live observant lives to those who do not. In general, who is more fulfilled, who has more nachas (pride) from their children? Which life do you want for yourself and your family?
Why the precise ingredients in Judaism work, I do not know. Only God knows. He created us and in the Torah taught us the optimal way to live. For thousands of years, His way has worked and His way will continue to work until the end of time.
Many see the benefits of an observant life but feel that it is beyond their ability. observance though, is not all or nothing. The more we observe, the more blessing we bring to our life. (This is not to say that observant Jews live a challenge free life, no one does and there would be no point to such a life. At the same time, regardless of the difficulties one has, a life of observance empirically yields greater fulfillment and greater protection from the negative influences of society than a life devoid of observance.)
Without realizing it, all Jews are already observing aspects of the Torah. At times, everyone eats kosher. On Saturday, no one is engaged all day in forbidden behavior. The key is to just widen the time and extent that one observes the Torah and to do so mindfully, because God commanded us. Even if one does not increase their level of observance one iota, but they start studying Torah regularly or send their children to yeshiva day schools and encourage them to study Torah in Israel post high school, they have made clear what their priorities are and what values they want to impart to the next generation.
Moses knew that a time would come when Jews would doubt their ability to follow the Torah and think it is beyond them. Before his death he urged them about the Torah (Deuteronomy 30:14), “Rather, the matter is very near to you, in your mouth and in your heart, to observe it.”
Moses pleaded with the Jewish people to always remember that the Torah is within their reach, no matter how far they stray. The Torah’s wisdom is very near to you. As close as the food in your mouth and the thoughts in your heart. It is who you are.
But to connect with your essence at the deepest level, you must take the initiative. It is up to you to observe the Torah, one step at a time.
Some see the value of an observant life but aren’t willing to put in the effort. They want the benefits without the work. But as we all know, if you want something of value, you have to put in the effort.
Bilam, a non Jewish prophet, saw the benefits of having lived a righteous life. He said (Numbers 23:10),”...May my soul die the death of the upright, and let my end be like his.” He wanted the results of living an upright life but he didn’t want to put in the effort.
Bilam’s mistake was that while he perceived through prophecy that the righteous would receive reward in the next world, he ignored what was right in front of his eyes! That living an upright life also brings blessing in this world! Right here, right now.
Do you want more blessing in your life? Then start the journey today. Pick one small observance to take on or strengthen, find a class or study partner to learn Torah with, pray to God for assistance, and look for ways to do more acts of kindness.
One day, after you are well along the journey, someone may point at you and say to their friend, “You see that person? I want that type of life for myself.”
Saturday, August 20, 2022
Updated: The Chazak Plan
Dear friends,
As we approach the month of Elul and the New Year, I have updated the Chazak Plan with new content.
Please email me your feedback and suggestions on it.
The Chazak Plan: A 12 Month Journey to Spiritual Strength
Thank you and have a great week,
Yaakov
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